(Q) My mother and I were over to the [
4255]'s home and they
were there, as was Henry Son and [
137] and [
140]. My mother
was crying, looked terrible, particularly black about the
eyes. She carried on fierce. Referring to me, she said:
"He hasn't even given me enough money to pay for food -
shouldn't he do that?" "If he owes it to you, he should,"
they replied, looking at me angrily. I felt mortified and
asked for a blank check, which was immediately furnished me.
I wrote out the amount called for, but wondered how I was
going to meet the money at the bank. Terribly humiliated,
I left there with [
137]. "Don't say anything and try not
to think of it." I told [
137]. He was blue as could be.
Further along I started to talk of it. "Now, [
900]," said
[
137], "you told me not to." I kept quiet and upon reaching
home noticed the upset condition of the house and the
darkened outlook. Among other sufferings, I knew not where
to turn for funds. I was suffering terribly and finally the
tears came.
(A) Again those conditions as respecting individuals and
that as is transpiring, mentally, in the minds of individuals
as seen, and as these conditions present those of unseeming
conditions, ones that would be in the way and manner of
those that would be consternation, those that would be of
the unrequiting conditions for the mental of the entity,
yet, as is seen in the tranquil change as is presented by
the individuals, so is that as is seen in the heart, mind
and being of individuals as are acted upon by fear, and those
that would treat that same condition as with love. Some
people call this condition as one hypnotizing, or mesmerizing
other individuals, it being the essence of that force as is
manifest in the physical world of that force that is the
impelling, and as to how same may be used, may be applied
the results and the outgrowths of same, are as those as have
been experienced by many, for, as the truth of same is seen:
Never may this be used save as in that same law as is seen in
the creative energy, of which it is a portion. Never, then,
as detrimental, but as that that would be good for all, for
without thought of self, self is expended for the good of
all, as is seen in all creative energy as is manifested in
the material world. Then, as is seen in this - as these
relations are presented - as is seen that death itself,
even, may enter in and this bring this unrequited condition,
yet the same element that produces birth produces death, and
they are one, and the beginning is the end and the end is the
beginning in same - so in respect of individuals' association
one with another. As has been given, "Though He were the
Son, and rebuked by His inferiors, yet railed He not them"
for the essence of the creative energy necessary for
expenditure, that the force as manifested may be One with
that creative energy.
(Q) July 28, 29 - night or morning. Saw Sidney Wormser and
a friend of his and they were about to be engaged in marriage
- that is, both Sidney and the man friend. I congratulated
them - but Waxelbaum, the friend, seemed undressed and
uncouth.
(A) Again we have presented that which, were it understood
by the entity (that as has just been given), would be more
easily understood in the mental forces of same. There is
presented in this, as we see, two individuals, of two
different positions, socially and financially, each entering
in a position - one in which that is impossible, the other
as has already entered - yet both seem to be entering that
as is seen to the physical mental-mind as the highest state
of association, morally, mentally, socially, in the life of
individuals in the earth's plane, see? This condition then
representing that element in the development of the entity,
[
900], see? and, as these enter in, some are seen to appear
uncouth, not prepared, as would be viewed from the state of
the mind from the individual, see? from the exterior view,
or the outside view, see? yet that as is seen taking place
represents, then, that as is taking place in the mind of
the entity, [
900], OR those about him as concerning the
development towards that which the entity would give to
others, that would and WILL become as tenets to lead others
to that position. As has been given, the Son was as the
bridegroom, see?
(Q) With them we reparied to the bridal feast. There at
that table sat the many, all rebellious, feasting, drinking
and mocking. One in tuxedo laughed and was sarcastic,
and boasted that he was a disowned son. I felt remorse
and far removed from these people - very much ill at ease.
(A) This rather the continuation of the same condition and
that as of the enjoying of same, as may be applied in the
life of the individual itself, which is easy to apply here,
with those as have been seen and given.
(Q) Then my mother sought to join one of them in marriage.
Feeling I should not stand in her way, I consented - then
later repented.
(A) Same condition as is represented in that as given,
though presented in a different manner, as would be the
relations as in reference to the entity and those whom
the entity would serve (the entity, [
900]) - the individuals
as seen, friends, family, and foes alike.
