This psychic reading given by Edgar Cayce at the home of David E. Kahn, 20 Woods Lane, Scarsdale, N.Y., this 8th day of November, 1936, in accordance with request made by the self - Miss [1286], sponsored by Mr. Thomas Sugrue, Active Member of the Ass'n for Research and Enlightenment, Inc.

Present: Edgar Cayce; Gertrude Cayce, Conductor; Gladys Davis, Steno. Miss [1286] and Thomas Sugrue. Born August 5, 1906, in Alliance, Ohio.

TEXT

1. EC: (In going back over the years to the birth date - "1912, 11, 10 - Yes, an experience then - '09, '08, '07," etc., on back to birth date.)
2. Yes, we have the records here of that entity now known as [1286].
3. In giving the interpretation of the experiences of the entity in the sojourns in the earth and the interims, and those experiences about the environs of the earth, we find these as innate or mental and those from the earthly sojourns as those from the emotional nature of the entity. As the emotions and the sensitive forces in the entity's experience are predominant, we will find rather that the material surroundings, the environs, the associations, the mental applications of self do influence the entity more than the astrological aspects. However, these remain as innate urges and may be aroused by the entity's application of self to turning within for divine guidance.
4. For as has been given, as ye trust in that divinity within, there may be given thee those things that have been thy experience from the foundations of the earth.
5. The astrological and the material sojourns then are urges. These do not go beyond the will, that is the birthright of each soul that it, the entity, may choose within itself that which is to be the guiding influence in the experience.
6. For, ever is that injunction before each soul in the daily experiences of life, or of a sojourn, "Today is set before thee life, death, good, evil, choose thou." For only in the choice does the soul make itself one with the Creative Forces or defy same in the love, the law, the promise as given to each soul, "Be my child, I will be thy God."
7. From the astrological aspects these urges as we find make for an innate influence. And where they have been applied in the experience become manifested as a portion of the entity's experience.
8. In Venus we find the innate longing for a companionship that is as an answer to a longing within self, as will be seen from a material as well as a spiritual experience of the entity. Those whom the entity chooses as friends are few, yet those who may claim the friendship of the entity may find indeed a true friend in the associations of the entity. Yet that innate tenderness of love, affection or sympathy is as an expression of the entity's experience in the material associations. And oft does the entity find that it has required, does require the putting away of the feelings that are seeking expressions in relationships with individuals that become a portion of the entity's experience.
9. From Mercury and Mars we find a confusing experience in the mental or innate forces of the entity. Yet it tends to make for a judgement in the experiences of things, of people, of circumstance. Oft with those activities in others that are the outcome of wrath, turmoil or differences, does the entity find its judgements bringing for itself a FEELING, an expression of safety in that which the entity has taken, or in which the entity itself HAS taken counsel or refuge.
10. Hence we find while the Mercurian influences as of wrath and war have oft made and do make for changes in the material experiences, these have oft proven and do prove in the experience of the entity to be those things wherein self may use same as beneficial experiences.
11. In Jupiter we find those influences of the activities as in associations with others, as inclined to that which deals with things in its MATERIAL application; as in things pertaining to an activity in the material influences for not so much conditions as of EXPERIENCES for individuals; in the activity of the entity in relationships to things, as in experiences of those things pertaining to application of influences in the experiences of the life or activity of individuals.
12. Hence the entity's associations become rather as a universal association but as individual in its application without the universal association.
13. Thus we find, from this universality of activity, there is made again the expression of those influences from Venus as of oft loneliness within the very expression of self. Seeking then for not that as of a universal force but as of an individual activity.
14. As from those forces in the very month of birth experience, these bring for the entity that of care as necessary in the health of the body as related to things having to do with the pulmonary system. And warnings should be ever taken in these directions. For the very nature of this influence makes for weakness in those portions of the physical body, or the tendencies. And only the application of self in the prevention of same may be the precaution pertaining to the laws of the very nature of the influence.
15. As to the appearances of the entity in the earth, these in the present we find while not so great in number as has been indicated, they do have a particular and a very definite influence in the MATERIAL sojourn of the entity, and in its activities in the material plane in the sojourn at present.
16. Before this, then, we find the entity was in the English land, during those periods when there was a great change in the religious activities of the peoples during the period of the studies of some of the religious forces that followed after those periods of the gatherings of groups for the defense, or in the Holy Wars.
17. The entity then took upon itself, with those of the younger forces or younger peoples, to become what is termed in the present a recluse - for the very activities in doing penance. And with the hands the greater labors were wrought.
18. Thus as may be seen in the experiences of the present, while those activities then made for oft the toil, the trial, the unsightly work of the hands even from the material angle of same, that which is as the promise to each and every soul in its expression; that whereunto there has been the service, whereunto there has been the expression of duty, love, patience, longsuffering, of an activity in a way and manner as to bring about in the experience of the soul-body the promises of the fruit of the spirit, may be brought and seen in the experiences the beauty in the hands, in the activities of same in the present.
19. The name then was Helaine Resnau, and there may be seen even yet, in some of the abbeys of the English land, the activities and preservations and influences of the Sister Helaine Resnau in those experiences.
20. In the application of self in these in the present, know - as was experienced then - the greater influence that may be brought to bear upon the associations and activities is in rather what the entity does about same; and how, in what manner one uses or applies self - and the prompting force that IMPELS same! For what, first, is thy ideal? Is it in the spiritual, in the mental, in the material? For He, that is the Giver of all good and perfect gifts, may bring in thy experience the glories, the beauties, the understandings of a purified, a glorified body, in the service of Him that is the Giver.
21. Before that, then, we find the entity was in the Persian experience when Ahasuerus was in power, and when there were turmoils, when there were strifes owing to the renouncing of the queen and the elevating of one of another peoples to one in authority.
22. The entity then was a waiting person, a companion person to the DETHRONED QUEEN; and with those associations, those activities, an influence was created that has ever been held not as an aversion yet AS an aversion - not as a material expression yet as of an innate aversion, as necessitated for the expression in the material plane and in the material activity, in the expression sense of an aversion to peoples of that particular class, group or race.
23. Hence in the experiences in the present, as has been found or has become necessary in the associations and in the activities to know, there is no respecter of persons in the eyes of Him who gives to all life, love, hope, truth, liberty, and understanding. For He is Lord of all.
24. The entity then, in the name Hoeleon, may be said to have gained and lost, to have gained; and yet to have found necessary within the experiences and the expressions that followed with the activities of the entity in that sojourn the dealing with the activities of those in material authority with a spiritual understanding.
25. Hence the entity has known, the entity will know, associations with individuals who are in authority, who are close to those that are the rulers of peoples, those that are to influence and will influence the thought of peoples in all walks of life.
26. It behooves the entity, then, to so live in its own inner self as to express the ideals that are ever a portion of each soul.
27. Before that we find the entity was in the land of the present nativity, during those periods when there were the spreadings of those teachings that had come from the lands from which those peoples came that were known as the Lost Tribes, as well as from Atlantis, Yucatan, the Inca, and the land of On [?]. [Og?]
28. They were portions of the entity's people then, in that part of the land now known as the central portion of Ohio, during the early portion of the Mound Builders.
29. There the entity was a priestess of those peoples that were a part of the experiences there of those peoples. For while confusions arose from the tenets of the Hebraic as well as the Atlantean, as well as the Inca, these became centralized or localized in the expressions of those peoples and those groups in that particular period of their activity.
30. Yet the greater blessings that the entity in its activity rendered the people in that experience were in the building of individual homes.
31. And this will become a part of the entity's experience in this sojourn. For within the next two and a half to three years there should come into the experience that association, the relations with one who was as a helpmeet to the entity during that sojourn.
32. For, as has been indicated from the innate experience as well as from the longings within, a home - HOME - with all its deeper, inner meanings, is a portion of the entity's desire; to know, to experience, to have the "feel" of, to have the surroundings of that implied by the word HOME! Is it any wonder then that in all of thy meditation, Ohm - O-h-m-mmmmm has ever been, is ever a portion of that which raises self to the highest influence and the highest vibrations throughout its whole being that may be experienced by the entity?
33. Thus does it behoove the entity to find in those activities that which will bring about in the experience that which will make HOME - HOME - as a REALITY; close to nature. Not in the strife and turmoil, not in cities, not where there are the surroundings of those forces that bespeak of the commercial life, but that as of NATURE! That as was given by the entity then as the priestess of those peoples, that made for the dedicating of their lives, that which would bring into the experience of each soul its relationships to NATURE as it manifests itself in its defiance of, in its laws with, in its beauties of, in its troubles with humankind; as it meets same in the rain, the sun, the storm, the dew, the beauty of the sun and the moon and all the glories of nature itself become rather as the song of the entity in its experience; when the sons of God with the voices of the winds sang together of the heralding of the glory of the noonday to the sons of God! That became as the chant of the entity in that experience, in the name Tulu.
34. In the application of same, much might be said in these directions. For these become so much a portion of the entity; and in those closer relationships with nature, with heaven, with the earth, with all the toils and troubles of same, with all the activities that come with same may be found the greater peace and harmony.
35. For what becometh to this soul that seeks so beautiful and joyous as the music in the rain or in the babbling brook or in the moonlight or in the noonday sun or in the beauty of the rose or the smile of the child! These become as those that give to the entity the greater expressions of the love of a merciful heavenly Father. For they bespeak of the promise of the rest of a home, of an ohm [?] with Him.
36. Before that we find the entity was in the land now known as the Egyptian, when there were the periods of the interpreting of the teachings from the varied lands.
37. The entity, from the activities in the Temple Beautiful, became an emissary to those in the Indian land, or in the land of Saneid, during those experiences when there was the correlating of those beauties of nature - yet applying same in the experiences of individual activity for that known as the conveniences; yet those that make for the glorifying of the gifts of same rather than indulging in the abuse of same for aggrandizement of appetites of the body.
38. In that experience the entity gained also, but lost in becoming as self-indulgent, self-aggrandizing in lording over those of not as perfect understanding.
39. Hence in those teachings, in those experiences may the entity find itself; yet in the application of that of Tulu as applied to the home may the entity find in this experience that which may bring the greater harmony, the greater joy. For the Lord is in His holy temple and has promised to meet thee in THY temple. As thou hast called oft for those in their individual associations to call upon the Mighty One of the hosts of the Heavenly One, so may thou in thy greater experience find within thine inner self and in thine ohm the glory of a living God.
40. Study then to show thyself approved, rightly dividing the words of truth, keeping self as an emblem of beauty to the world, of things, of affairs, of conditions. Build THOU a home!
41. Ready for questions.
42. (Q) How and when can this life work be best begun?
    (A) As has been indicated, it should be within the next two and a half years.
43. (Q) Is the proposed trip to California in January advisable, and should the entity plan to stay there?
    (A) This would be very well.
    For as we find this may bring about those associations and connections that would start - a home!
44. (Q) Is there any possibility of recouping the financial losses of the entity?
    (A) This, of course, depends upon the application of self.
    Rather should THIS become as the consciousness of the entity:
    That thou hast lost you never had. That thou hast given away thou only hast. That thou only desirest and art not willing to wait and work for, ye will never have.
45. (Q) What is the significance of the "M" left on the entity's writing pad two years ago?
    (A) As has been indicated as to the entity being "sensitive" to the influences about self, this is a sign, an omen of an influence outside of self that might become a destructive or a helpful influence. But ever is there the choice. This then is rather as the proof and as the understanding to the entity of such an influence.
46. (Q) Is there any chance of recovering the watch lost by the entity on Monday, Nov. 2, 1936?
    (A) This as we find, while entering into those of other influences - we will hold, we will give to those that have been the cause of the removal of same a troubled heart, and these may make for a return. Lest they reject those influences as brought to bear. Hope for, and then know if there is not the return - that it is best.
47. (Q) Is there, in spirit, an entity named Arnel who has a connection with the entity, [1286]?
    (A) Rather named Arhaniel [?], or Haynes [?]. You'll meet him; in the flesh, yes.
48. (Q) Any other advice for the entity at this time?
    (A) Let thy activities in the present, in all thy associations, in all thy relations, ever be in the preparation for those influences, those forces thou hast given so generously to man; that there may be built more and more in the hearts and minds of all to know the home and its meanings in the lives, the experiences. WRITE that which has been prompted oft in thy loneliness, of the home and the friend. And these expressions of same will assist in not only thy dedicating but consecrating of thy life to the joys that may materially be thine in thy home - in the west.
49. We are through for the present.

    Copy to Self
    Copy to Ass'n file

REPORTS

1. 11/20/36 See GD's letter to HLC in New York City, filed in 520-4, in re Mr. [520] showing a paper he had written about EC to first person he met, who turned out to be Miss [1286] who had just obtained her Life reading the day before!
2. 12/10/36 EC's letter to Miss [1286]:
   "...Wonder how you have found your reading when you have, in the quiet of your own conscious, read it over. Does it help anywhere along the line? For it to be a real living thing is my wish, for unless it can furnish something either in an informative way, or some assurance that is practical, it doesn't go very far. Possibly there have been or may be questions that arise in your mind that you would like to question me about. Please don't hesitate if such has been the case.
   "Anyway, when you have studied it over, write me, won't you? For I feel an interest in each one and try and help, and if I am not succeeding, would surely like to know it..."
3. 1/12/37 Miss [1286]'s letter to EC:
   "...What must you think of me! Here it is a month since your very nice letter arrived - and I am only now acknowledging it.
   "I am counting on you to understand when I tell you the reason for my procrastination, though it is rather difficult to write about. Anyway, since about the middle of November I have been struggling through a 'Slough of Despond'. Why, I don't exactly know, but suspect that it is due to a great extent to the fact that I'm really very unhappy inside - unhappy because I am dissatisfied with my life and myself - not accomplishing anything worthwhile and apparently lacking in that subtle spark which drives people on to accomplish great things. Unhappy, too, because I am lonely with a loneliness which I fear only one being in this great universe can assuage. Who and where that being is - I know not. Though I want to work and keep busy, I am tired of struggling as so many of us do for mere existence, becoming so wearied in mind, body and spirit, in the process, that there's nothing left to give to God and our fellow beings.
   "My health has never been particularly good either and may be partly responsible for my despondency. I seem to be always feeling below par. I've read a great deal about the human body, food chemistry, etc. and live as sensibly as possible - to no avail. Yet all about me I see people who completely disregard even the simplest rules for health and are simply blooming with it. Nature can't be so perverse, so it must be my karma. Do you think that's it? Or maybe I just need a real holiday. "My reading was, and still is, to me very interesting, but I have been unable to apply it. The truths and principles contained therein have been known to me for a long, long time, but I have learned that knowledge is of no use unless it is applied. We must practice the laws and principles which we have learned, yet when I try I seem to be held in a viselike grip by my old wrong habits of thought, word and action, which prevent me from doing so. Sometimes I fear that I am being influenced by forces on the astral plane - sinister forces, I mean. When I tell you that three years ago I was in the habit of attending from two to four seances every week over a period of eight or ten months, I think you will agree with me that I may have attracted such forces to myself. If I had the reading to do over again I would phrase my questions somewhat differently so as to get more explicit answers. The future still remains a vague, unknown quantity - the immediate future at least - the gap between now and three years hence. My plans for going to California have collapsed due to a change in the plans of the friend who was driving out and taking me along. Once there, I would have had to earn a living somehow, and I neglected to ask during my reading just how I could do that. Everyone says it's practically impossible to get work of any kind there.
   "The answer to the seventh question at the end of my reading [Par. 48-A] has me 'stymied' too, for I haven't been conscious of being prompted to write anything. I've done my share of day-dreaming but doubt that anyone else would be interested in the details.
   "I haven't seen Mr. Sugrue nor have I called the Parkers' [Mr. and Mrs. Dale Parker] though I would like very much to do so. I am trying very hard to snap out of this mood and will see Mr. Sugrue sometime this week. I hesitate to call the Parkers' after so long a delay - or do you think they would understand the reason for it?
   "Well, dear Mr. Cayce, I hope this letter doesn't seem morbid to you - I didn't mean it to. I believe you were inspired to write to me just when you did because hearing from you at that particular time cheered me up a lot, and if you have the time to write again, I will certainly enjoy hearing from you..."
4. 1/15/37 EC's letter to Miss [1286]:
   "...Thanks for yours of the 12th. I appreciate your taking time to write. I think I can fully appreciate your feelings, for I, too, have periods when there seems to be nothing that can or will come right, getting nowhere and the outlook anything but promising. It is indeed one thing to know, and quite another thing to put into daily practice, that we do know. But there is where wisdom comes in, for, will we but realize that the power to choose, the power to exercise wisdom is within our own minds, we will accomplish much more by simply meditating, or as the Good Book says, meet God in the temple of our own bodies. He has promised to do so, and always keeps that promise; not to something outside ourselves but within, and listen to the still, small voice within. For, we remember even the sages of old, whether those given us in the scripture, or in other writings, it is always the same.
   "And let that prayer or meditation be something like this, though always put it in your own words: 'I am the child of the Infinite Life, that flows within me, has built for me a perfect temple to live in. When I live and move and have my being in it, with Faith and Love, it guides me, protects me and watches over me, day and night. So, I am renewed each day, filled with Health, Wealth, Love, Freedom, Peace of mind, Serenity of Soul. And now I thank thee, Father, and rest in Peace for all is Well.' Something like that in your own words not merely said each night and morning, but said in such manner that you feel his Presence, will change your health, and your outlook on life. Won't you give it a try?
   "Yes, it may be possible that by attending meetings where we take on the miseries of the world, we surround ourselves with forces that prey upon us. I never like to say anything about such, for the survival of personality is all too true, for it is the individuality of the Christ we seek rather than the personality of anyone. Our karma is with Him, not that we do not meet it, we do, but how well we are prepared when we do, do we but carry Him as our shield and buckler - then what a wonderful difference it will make, and we can do it best by remembering what he has said to us always, 'When you call I will hear' and no matter how lonely, no matter how far away we may feel we have gotten, He is always there. Then, rather than feeling that others about us are enjoying the things we lack, we can enjoy their having them, feeling and knowing the joy we have is in the right way that will not bring disappointments. But you just try this little trick of taking HIM with you in prayer night and morning, and noon also if you have the time, and you will find the grandest partner you have ever had. These other things will then mean so little.
   "Plans, outlook, and everything will change when you have the inner consciousness, that HE is abiding with you. Possibly that will bring the desire to write; possibly your walks, your talks with Him, or whatever it may be.
   "Let's try it, and then let me hear. Yes, am sure Mr. and Mrs. Parker will be glad to see you at any time. I wish you would go talk with them. It would help you and them also. "...I'm glad to try and help. That is my one and only purpose in life - help others to experience the personal walk with GOD..."
5. 1/19/37 [1286]'s letter to EC:
   "...Thank you so much for your kind letter. I will take your advice and let you know what happens - if anything. Hope there will be a change..."
6. 10/50 Extract from Gina Cerminara's book, MANY MANSIONS, concerned with reincarnation and karma, pages 71-72 from the chapter entitled An Interlude of Comment:
   Not all the karmic examples in the the Cayce files are instances of frustrations and abnormalities, however. We shall see later, when we come to cases on vocational guidance, how human ability, talent, genius, distinction of any sort are the karmic rewards of lives well spent along these same directions in the past.
   A favorable environment and a healthy body are also positive karmic consequences, but explanation is not often given by the readings for their karmic basis - possibly because the source of information, like a good news reporter, recognized that it is not the good, but the calamitous, that has news value. People who obtained readings shared the general human tendency of feeling that there is no need of an explanation for good fortune; man usually feels instinctively that it is his inherent right. It is only when he suffers ill fortune that he begins to question why it has happened.
   Personal beauty is a likewise karmic consequence. The readings have occasionally indicated, in general terms, that a beautiful body in the present is the result of care devoted to the body, the temple of the spirit, in the past. There is one interesting instance in which the reading gave another Karmic reason for beauty. This is the case of a striking New York model whose unusually beautiful hands bring her much in demand with nail polish, hand lotion, and jewelry merchants who feature hands in their advertisements. The karmic cause for her gift of beauty was found in the incarnation immediately preceding the present, when she was a recluse in an English convent. Her life had been spent in performing menial and distasteful tasks with her hands; she did them with such a dedicated spirit of selflessness and service, however, that her consecration of spirit was transmuted into the unusual beauty of her person and of her hands.
   Here, indeed, is a heartening example to those who long for beauty. It should serve also to remind us that all karma is not disciplinary and constrictive in effect. Examples of the punitive aspects of karma are perhaps more impressive than illustrations of its beneficent aspects - more impressive and more necessary to the generally confused and morally bankrupt outlook of our time. Intelligent human beings must have an intelligent moral basis for life; the orthodox dogmas of the church are no longer acceptable to many critically trained scientific minds. Thus the traditional sanctions and ideals have crumbled, but no new, scientifically acceptable notions have risen to take their place.
7. 2/58 Elsie Sechrist's note: "...Thought you might like enclosed for records since it has to do with someone who had a Life reading. The letter is from Bernice Ridgeway* who becam Mrs. Wiatt. I believe she, Mrs. Wiatt, is still a member...:
   "When at the Rancho one Saturday I rode over to a place called Right Living about six or seven miles from the border in California. In the car with me in the back seat was a woman that had just arrived. She seemed very depressed and lonely. Somehow we started talking about her health which is not the best. She had an accident - seemed she stumbled over a plank that had been put across the sidewalk as there was some construction work or new concrete put in. This was to block it off, but there was no light and it was dark. She fractured her skull and had a concussion - was in a coma for days. Doctors took a couple of spinal fluid tests and as a result of them taking the fluid, she is in a very bad state today. Not only that - she has broken relations with her brother and sister, the only members of her family left - seems her sister had beaten her out of her inheritance and is scornful of this woman I met. That's a psychological thing but I won't go into it. We were on religion, etc., and she asked if I had heard of Edgar Cayce, and if I had had a reading. Anyhow, she did, and then said she had been a Powers' model. I at once said, 'Are you the one with the beautiful hands?' and she said 'yes'. Her name is [1286]. Then she went on to tell me how Tom Sugrue had come to interview her and they somehow started talking metaphysics instead and he talked all P.M. and it was fifteen minutes to five and he had not interviewed her yet, so in fifteen minutes he got the interview. Of course, Tom told her all about Cayce and [1286] then decided to have a reading and Tom made the appointment. [1286] did all the Cutex and other nail polish company ads, hosiery, the Jonker diamond, in fact, everything where hands were important. She also told
   * [2/09/79 GD's note: Bernice Ridgeway was a mbr. of SFG Los Angeles Study Group. See mention of her in 8/11/52 ltr. under 5628-11 Reports. Later she became Bernice Wiatt, then later Bernice Brown (under Bernice Brown she painted a portrait of Edgar Cayce, fr. a photograph, in 1975, now hanging in EC Fdn. office.] me how they discovered her hands, etc. Of course, you would never pick her as a model today. She is very ordinary looking, but is tall and thin and has very thin, long fingers. To top it, she says she did believe in reincarnation at one time, but now belongs to the Assembly of God Church somewhere on Georgia Street in Los Angeles; is most devoted, claims God has spoken to her; believes in the Bible word for word; is very narrow in her concepts as I see it; literally believes in hell, claims to have studied all religions, but I believe in a very superficial way, perhaps read above them. I don't think that if she had a knowledge of metaphysics she could accept the views she now has. I know she has had some wonderful religious experiences when she was so ill, and as she said, "she threw herself on the mercy of Christ and it was that that saved her life." She only was in Rancho La Puerta two days, was looking for a place to settle - has no one, is lonely, unhappy and broken in health. She is a lovely person though, and I do hope things improve for her..."
8. 9/21/76 Letter from Miss [1286]:
   "...I had a Life reading by Edgar Cayce one Sunday afternoon in Scarsdale, N.Y. when he was visiting friends there, in about 1938. The appointment was arranged for me by the late Tom Sugrue who at that time was on the staff of the American Magazine and author of THERE IS A RIVER. Gina Cerminara subsequently used my reading in her book, MANY MANSIONS. I was the New York model with the famous hands (most photographed in the world).
   "...Could you look it up and send me a copy at this time?..."
9. 10/05/76 A copy of 1286-1 was sent with letter requesting her comments on her reading.
10. 6/12/77 Miss [1286]'s report on her Life reading:
    "...Thank you so very much for your letters of last October 5th and 12th, the copies of my reading and correspondence with Mr. Cayce - so long ago! And the brochures about A.R.E., the [Edgar Cayce] Foundation and hospital. How you have grown! Marvelous! Wish I could visit and see it all. Please accept my apology for the long delay in replying. I did begin a letter to you and obtained a money order for the $3.00 fee you mentioned [to cover the costs of handling and postage] which I will enclose herewith. It seems very reasonable for the work and expense entailed. Before I could complete my letter to you I had another heartbreaking experience (seems to be the story of my life) and this caused a relapse in my physical condition that I've been struggling ever since to overcome. I simply cannot cope with things as I ought and wish to. "I have emphysema (1286-1, Par. 14, yes!) having had bronchial pneumonia as a very young child which left my lungs full of scar tissue; also have radiation sickness with all its horrors, caused by excessive X-rays (very deadly!) made at the local hospital over my objections. I thought they would make only one or two, as any expert would have [done] under the circumstances for none were really necessary at all, but 73! They caused paralytic ileus, the radiation sickness with its many destructive effects, continual distress, falling hair, premature aging, and finally leukemia. I've been fighting it for five years now, and life simply isn't worth living this way... Re: Yours of the 5th:
    "[Par. 1] Yes, there was a happening in 1910 when I was just four years old that had a far-reaching effect on my life; ruined it, in fact. My father, who had a violent temper, was very harsh to my mother one day and then she went out to do some grocery shopping. Because of his mistreatment of her I was afraid she wouldn't come back home again and I began to cry. This so angered my father that he gave me a terrible beating, inflicting permanent internal injuries. Years later, in New York, I was treated for these conditions but without any benefit. When my mother returned from the store that day my precious little grandmother who was visiting us was weeping over me. I didn't remember this incident but Mother told me about it shortly before she died in 1956 so I would know the cause of my frail health. I had been a very healthy and beautiful child up to that time, exceptionally bright and intelligent, but thereafter I lost weight, became thin and very nervous, and withdrawn from life. So I have remained ever since despite my many efforts to improve my condition. Doctors were never any help so I was driven to study to help myself in order to survive. Without God's help, and the knowledge and experience I've gained, and applied, I wouldn't be alive today. I'll be 71 on August 5th. Except for the years I lived in New York and my modeling career, my life otherwise has been very hard and unrewarding. I have always tried to help others in any way I can, often at considerable sacrifice, and still do despite my poor condition, yet have been dealt with very shabbily in return. I wonder why, unless it is Psalms 44:22. Of course, it drove me to seek God as only one with a desperate need, so wholeheartedly that I guess He took pity on me and made Himself very real to me. I have had spiritual experiences that I daresay not many have had and wish I had the ability to do justice to them in writing for I feel they are worth recording so that others might be encouraged to seek Him, too, and be comforted. Jesus has appeared to me twice and God has spoken to me on one occasion to comfort me, and on two occasions to advise me in how to treat a serious condition: Leukemia with protonosis, considered incurable by the medical profession, and more recently my leukemia with radiation sickness, and all its plagues. Except for a few manipulative treatments to my spine by a therapist when I had the leukemia with protonosis because my spine was injured in a fall, I have treated myself entirely. No more doctors for me. God said, 'these conditions are only incurable when the wrong methods of treatment are used.' For my present condition He told me to use hyssop, an herb tea. ...I have managed with a variety of herbs and other supplements and simple, natural measures to keep myself alive through three bouts with cancer, three strokes, and multiple brain injuries sustained when I tripped over a warped plank of wood left lying on a sidewalk one dark night as I was hurrying to church in Los Angeles. I had a fracture, concussion, shock, cerebral hemorrhage, and a subdural hematoma (tumor of diffused blood under the covering of the brain). Needless to say, it took a few miracles to pull me through all that. It's a long story and I don't want to bore you but God was there all the time. I had some fascinating experiences that I couldn't have had any other way. The suffering I endured was a high price to pay but I wouldn't have wanted to miss those experiences.
    "Re [See Par. 31--35, 39, 40, 42-A, 43-A, 48]: My desire to have a home. Very true, and I finally achieved it in 1958, when I was already 52 years old. It is a very modest little cottage [in Palm Springs, California] and I must give it up because I am no longer able to do all the house and yard work nor can I afford to hire it done. I'm thinking of moving into a retirement home where I will have only one room to take care of. I never met the man in Par. 47-A. As for writing, [Par. 48-A] I have the desire but don't seem to have the gift. The only writing I've done, other than letters, was a short script I entered in a national contest. Winners were used on the Betty Furness program over CBS about ten years ago. Mine was one of the scripts used.
    [See Par. 31--35, 40, 42-A, 43-A, 48]: "When I was young I had an astonishing number of opportunities to marry - very good, substantial men. Some had prominent positions but I never felt as though marriage was for me and so I always declined.
    "One man I did agree to marry, for we had a remarkable spiritual experience, and God gave him a revelation about me which was very good; but even in that case I pulled out and didn't go through with it. He was a Christian diplomat and was subsequently assassinated by enemies of his country, and now I regret that I haven't had the experience of marriage, to balance my spiritual life. I wish Mr. Cayce were still living. How I would love to have a talk with him now. He was such a kind, gentle man.
    "I don't really want to go into a retirement home and be surrounded by a lot of people and the accompanying hubbub. Much rather would I choose a little place close to nature as described on [in] Par. 33--35. When I first came to Palm Springs it was just a quiet little village with clean sparkling air and a charm all its own but it is very different now so I must get out regardless. Perhaps my health will improve in a better climate. The heat here in summer is very oppressive and there is always too much wind with blowing dust and sand, and terrible pollution. Smog blows in through the San Gorgonio Pass from all the cities to the west of us, including Fontana with its steel mills belching tons of poisonous fluoride gas into the air every day.
    "To summarize:
    Par. 1: Yes, the beating by my father when I was four years [old]. Par. 14: Yes, emphysema. Par. 21--26: The dethroned queen was Vashti, who was supplanted by the Jewish girl, Esther. I might say that I think I have an insight into the Jewish problem; into the ways, attitudes and maneuvers, that probably stems from that embodiment experience. Also, I have associated with individuals who were close to those in authority [Par. 25]. While living in New York I was accepted into the inner circle of the members of the Russian nobility who had fled their homeland to escape being slaughtered by the Bolsheviks, who were Jews, you know, from New York's Lower East Side, 1700 of them, well organized and trained, financed by Kuhn, Loeb and Co., Wall Street whose partner, Jacob Schiff, boasted in print that the success of the Bolshevik Revolution was due 'to the genius of Jewish brains and planning.' As one writer put it, 'the Jews have fouled their own nest' in Russia, but they are never satisfied anywhere. See John 8:44 and Galatians 3:29. [See Par. 23, 24.] I found the members of the Russian nobility to be fine, sensitive, and very spiritual people. The man I agreed to marry also came from a highly placed family. His father was an ambassador, so that would corroborate [Par. 25]. My fiance, who was assassinated was done in by the Jews because he voted against Israel in the United Nations where he was a delegate.
    "Par. 31--35 describe the kind of home environment I would like to have...I hope this letter and its contents gives you the information you desire..."

Edgar Cayce Readings © 1971, 1993, 1994, 1995 by the Edgar Cayce Foundation