1/47 Oral report to GD: "In 1920 I was very much in love
with a poor young man of whom my mother disapproved. Later,
out of spite, I ran away with our chauffeur and married him
[I should have stood up to my mother and married the one I
loved - my life would have been so different - probably would
have had a dozen children. As it is, I have had to turn to
metaphysics for the answer]. After several years I had to
divorce the chauffeur - he was making me bankrupt. Later I
married another man who had divorced his wife in order to
marry me. I found out afterwards that he only married me for
my money and was still living with his former wife. Years
later I tried marriage for the third time - shortly
afterwards found out he was a homosexual. So, I had to go it
alone. I turned to metaphysics, became a member of the
Theosophical Society. I got mixed up with a group that used
me for experimenting in trance work. I would come out of
these sessions very depleted in strength and lacking in will
power. Finally I gathered up enough strength to break with
them.
"My mother has always been a karmic influence in my life.
She was a terrible woman - ruined the lives of her husband
and children. I stood up to her more than the others.
"The doctors are treating me for leukemia - using a new
treatment that is supposed to delay it. I don't know why I
go to all the trouble to take the treatments - I am not
especially interested in living - I'd just as soon go on to
the next plane."
4/13/48 Mrs. [
1770]'s letter: "Certainly enjoyed [
3000];
she is a lovely soul and her home is beautiful. Some people
have everything in this life."
4/58 Report by friend to whom she had shown her Life Rdg.:
"Many of the characteristics mentioned in her Life Rdg., I
know were very true. For instance, her love of the soil, the
outdoors, urge to entertain. She is very mannish, too, and
she thinks like a man. The reading said she was a man in her
Norse incarnation."
2/26/49 Letter: "Every one that I know in my situation is
living on their principal and I only hope that I do not live
too long, as I can do no physical work and am dependent on at
least one servant."