10/30/73 Mr. [
3198]'s letter:
Dear Gladys,
Re: Life Reading 3198-1 [Different numbering from his copy]
I'm sorry to say that the numbers of my readings have been
so mutilated and obscured that I can't make them out. Will
this prevent you from connecting them up with what I have to
report? Mr. Clapp suggested that I write you regarding
anything to confirm the life reading which I obtained in 1940
in Hawaii, while I was in the army. I assume he means
"anything," so I'll go through it and make positive comments
as to what I consider evidential:
P. 2, par. 2 [Par. 6]: The readings description of me in
the third paragraph was "right on the nose" in every way
respect, the paragraph beginning, "Thus, as we find..."
P. 2, par. 4 [Par. 8]: A curious "coincidence" is to be
noted in the fifth paragraph. "Erasmus" is a family name
and my father once told me that a priest in Rome in our
family was named Erasmus. My father was not educated, so I'm
quite sure he did not know that Erasmus was from the Greek
and that the name meant "lovable." This paragraph in the
reading begins: "This, then makes for an entity that is
lovable." I didn't know it either at the time of the reading
but found out years later. In this paragraph the reading hit
upon the central problem of my life, that I've always felt
unloved and unlovable. In the last few years I've traced in
dream-reverie some of the childhood incidents that gave me
this feeling, which has colored my whole life, so that I
understand much better today its "psychological" roots.
Nevertheless, love in many ways remains a thorny problem for
me, although I've arrived at considerable inner adjustment
just in the last few years, about 3 or 4 years (today I am 57
years old).
P. 2, par. 4 [Par. 8]: When the reading states in the last
sentence of that (fifth) paragraph and in the sixth paragraph
always was true, that I did and still do exercise an
understanding of my experiences as opportunities for
achieving "more perfect understanding," etc., etc. If I
hadn't somehow had the ability to exercise this faculty, I'm
sure I would have cracked up many years ago.
P. 2, par. 6 [Par. 10]: The reading's description of my
personality in the seventh paragraph is also very accurate
in that first sentence, beginning, "One that will find
refuge ever..."
P. 2, par. 7 [Par. 11]: The description in the first few
sentences of the eighth paragraph was also entirely accurate.
The trend of my life the last few years is more and more
as he mentioned in the remainder of this paragraph.
P. 3, par. 2 [Par. 12]: As to the ninth paragraph, I've
never been quite sure what it referred to. I've been (with
gaps of non-smoking occasionally for a period of 6 months to
3 years) a chain smoker since I was 21. On the other hand,
since about 8 years ago, when I reached a crisis in my life,
physically and emotionally, I've taken much better care of
myself, particularly in my diet, and have felt a tremendous
improvement all around. In about 1947 I became infected with
a serious dysentery from contaminated vegetables. I was sick
for weeks and when we finally called the doctor (which I
refused to have until I felt I was getting better) he said
he didn't know how I pulled through it alone. I didn't tell
him either, but I treated myself with 2 things only, loads
of Glyco-Thymoline and Atomidine. (My physical reading had
mentioned that I should take Glyco-Thymoline regularly.)
He gave me no medication but just prescribed chicken soup.
In this paragraph [Par. 12] he mentions "a minor infraction"
etc., and to this day I have formed no understanding of this
reference. I could speculate, but there seems no point in
that.
P. 3, par. 4 [Par. 14]: The eleventh paragraph starts on
my reincarnation during "construction days following the
American Revolution." I once visited an exhibit of a model
home of colonial days at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in
New York, and I found myself deeply drawn and moved by the
rooms. Somehow they seemed familiar and "at home" to me.
P. 3, par. 6 [Par. 16]: The fourteenth paragraph, "Then in
the name Lawrence Avery..." refers to coding, datasticians,
statisticians. I have a strong repugnance to statistical
work, although I am very accurate and fast with figures.
Mathematical puzzles have always fascinated me and I'm good
at solving them. But I am an expert in and love to do
acrostics and crossword puzzles are like child's play to
me. I've even constructed crossword puzzles. Secret codes
and stories about the breaking of codes have since childhood
been subjects of interest to me, though I've never had work
along this line.
P. 3, par. 7 [Par. 17]: "Hence, those things pertaining to
livestock, to hides..." begins the 15th paragraph. The only
association I had here for years was that as a child the
smell of fresh leather nauseated and suffocated me to the
point of nausea and vomiting. I still find it unpleasant.
But only in the last few years I became aware of other
components of this carry-over. For years, unconsciously,
I always felt uncomfortable on rugs of any kind, and
particularly irritating to me were small rugs or anything
soft under my feet, even a piece of cloth. And then I
realized this was particularly so when I was wearing shoes.
And simultaneously I realized that I had this from working
with hides and pieces of hides which in my workshop in the
life would often fall underfoot and which I would kick aside.
This flashed into my mind one day when I was kicking aside,
as was my habit, the bathroom rug. Another thing in this
connection was my distaste of touching fur at all, and
associated with this an aversion to touching furry animals.
And one day I realized upon touching a suede jacket being
worn by someone that I found the feel of it most repugnant.
So all of this does seem to pertain to that reincarnation
as given in the reading in this short paragraph.
P. 3, par. 8 [Par. 18]: The sixteenth paragraph I believe
points to my trait, particularly of earlier years (I'm much
better now) of constantly arguing and trying to persuade
others to my beliefs in the occult ideology, while, apart
from the intellect, I was in many ways remiss in the
applications of what I understand.
P. 3, par. 8 [Par. 19]: The seventeeth paragraph begins
the English reincarnation. The first paragraph may relate
in this life to my association with radical and
revolutionary causes, particularly during 1950, 1951 and
1952. But I'm still intensely aware of political programs
and issues and find myself generally in agreement with the
left wing.
P. 4, par. 1 [Par. 20]: As to the 18th paragraph I have no
associations around this that I am aware of. [Ordinance?]
P. 4, par. 2 [Par. 21]: However, as to the nineteenth
paragraph, I did a few years ago work as a teacher for 6
months (I was then quite prepared to make a career in this
field and took a great interest in what I was doing) in an
institution that was founded to help rehabilitate crippled
people, both physically and mentally. Through no will of
mine, this particular activity was terminated, but I did find
it rewarding, found my pupils responsive to me and feel I
had real promise for this work. However, I no longer am
inclined to work in this field as it is presently organized
and administered.
P. 3., par. 6 & p. 4, par. 3 [Par. 16, 22]: (By the way I
checked in libraries on both names, Lawrence Avery in
post-revolutionary times, and Alexander Attellu in Norman,
England, but was not able to find either one. My checking
was just a scratching of the surface, of course.)
P. 4, par. 2 [Par. 21]: Perhaps, the fact that on those few
occasions I've been in court I find myself very
uncomfortable, and that I feel invariably antagonistic to the
judge and never expect justice, may be related to this
experience in England, since I was presumably tried and
hanged or beheaded. On the other hand it could simply be a
reflection of the poor quality and functioning of our courts
and court personnel.
P. 4, par. 4, 5 [Par. 23, 24]: The twenty-first paragraph
begins the reincarnation "in the promised land..." Outside
of the fact that I accept Jesus as my elder brother, guide
and teacher (despite my ventures and knowledge of Buddhism,
The Vendata, Yoga, Zen and Taoism) I have no associations
I can fix on as to the this and the next paragraphs.
P. 4, par. 6 [Par. 25]: As to the twenty-third paragraph,
while I do feel I have the executive abilities referred to,
I've only recently been headed somewhat in this direction.
I've never really understood the reference here, "though in
a mercantile activity." (I just noticed he adds, "or of
such nature." Odd that I never observed that before, since
it does clarify it somewhat.)
P. 4, par. 7 [Par. 26]: In the twenty-second paragraph I
wish to state this is, even in business, always my
aspiration, and I do try to keep with "those spiritual forces
that prompt" me, etc., etc. It seems like my essential
nature.
P. 4, par. 8 [Par. 27, 28]: In the twenty-third paragraph
I don't understand the specific reference in the first
sentence, but the prayer the reading gives here I've used
ever since, though somehow "that capacity" referred to was
never clear to me, since no work I performed for a livelihood
ever approached such a capacity. (It was curious that over
the years I've always made the remark now and then that "I
should have been a minister or priest.") Now, however,
during the past few years, the meaning of this begins to
dawn on me. Over the years I've written a number of essays,
all with metaphysical, philosophic and spiritual content
(the only kind of writing that has ever appealed to me) and
increasingly in the last few years, along with poetry of a
similar nature. (I've never sought publication, but am now
preparing to print them at my own expense.) Most all seem
to be directed to the fulfillment of this prayer, "...in
which the world may know of thee in a greater, and in a
better light or application," though they were not written
with this conscious intention.
P. 4, par. 10 & p. 5, par. 1 [Par. 30]: In the
twenty-fourth paragraph the two names given for the Promised
Land reincarnation do not ring any bell or evoke any
association.
P. 5, par. 2 [Par. 31]: The twenty-fifth paragraph starts
the reincarnation in "Egyptian land during...preparations
for many to go into foreign lands as emissaries." I had
always thought of myself as one of those emissaries, but
I noted just this past year that the reading may imply this
but doesn't state it specifically. There obviously was an
inner response when I first read this and I knew I was one
of the emissaries.
P. 5, par. 3 [Par. 32]: The twenty-sixth paragraph is a true
statement. I've always been good in learning languages but
find, if I don't use them, I tend to lose my fluency. I've
studied and gotten high marks in Latin, German, Italian and
French and have picked up a good deal of Spanish. My wife
also shares this interest and ability and I feel she was
certainly in this reincarnation with me, as well as the
English revolutionary one. The others I'm not sure of.
P. 5, par. 4 [Par. 33]: The twenty-seventh paragraph
probably refers to my over-concern through much of my life
with the "outside" spiritual, physical and economic
conditions of the earth, and an overlooking of studying to
show myself "approved unto God," the necessary "inside"
work.
P. 5, par. 5 [Par. 33]: The twenty-eighth paragraph hits
home in that for years I felt ashamed that much of my
self-support and support of my family was by stenography and
I used to say I hated typing (at which I've always been
superior...when I first learned I won first prize in a
state stenography contest). I even refused to type and
got away from shorthand and typing in a job that lasted
about ten years, as an administrative assistant. But in
the last few years I've gotten (through teaching typing
and shorthand) into typesetting, photo and cold typesetting,
Compugraphic and IBM equipment. I suddenly enjoy typing,
now that I'm using it at a higher skill level in typesetting.
I'm really good in this field (at the same time I always feel
that the skill is really being exercised by the Self).
His reference in this paragraph to condemnation of self
along with others pinpointed a dominant trait in me for
years, but this has largely been surmounted.
P. 5, par. 6 [Par. 34]: In the twenty-ninth paragraph,
"Remember the prayer: 'Forgive, even as I forgive'..."
I applied this consciously a few years ago for the first
time, with reference to many resentments I had buried in
myself, and found myself liberated from a burden I had
carried for a long time. As to the "questionable nature"
of the "active influence," I've recently had more insight
into this too, so that I feel sure it is past the turning
point, though still there.
A-1 [Par. 36-A]: The answer at the end of the reading was
pointed and cogent, and the last paragraph again referred to
characteristics that were present much more strongly in the
past than now. The last 5 lines of this closing paragraph
today have a great deal of meaning for me, and I feel that
the movement of my life at last consciously is in this
direction, though I now see that this direction always
formed the matrix of my development over the years, however
spotty and occasional it may have been.
That is it, I guess.
I hope you can read my writing (note that in my aversion
to typing this kind of material, which still lingers, I
had written this out by hand and intended to let you suffer
trying to decipher my scribbling). Probably, though, this
is self-condemnation, since I really find it more convenient
to write rather than to type, and somehow my ideas flow
better when I write. All my creative work is done by pen at
first.
Remember me to Mr. Turner, Al. My love to both of you
wonderful souls. [GD's note: He had not heard that Albert
E. Turner died in 1968.]
Sincerely, E./Ras [
3198]
P.S. As a typesetter, and greatly to my liking, I am now
Ras [
3198] (derived from the second syllable of Erasmus).
For years I was called "Eddie" which I never felt or liked,
though my immediate circle of friends and family still use
it. I never liked Erasmus, because of early associations
with corruptions of it like "Rastus" "Rasmo", etc.
10/23/74 GD's letter to Mr. [
3198]:
Dear Ras:
This is a great nickname and I like it so much better than
"Eddie", though Edgar Cayce preferred it for himself and
wished that more people would call him that, as he never
cared for the name Edgar.
Thank you so much for the detailed report on your Life
Reading which you sent about a year ago. (I dictated a long
letter on tape to you very shortly after receiving the
report, but something was wrong with the tape and the girl
could not transcribe it. All this time your letter has been
piled with other things on my desk waiting for an answer!)
I am very grateful to Bob Clapp that he suggested you do
this. I am making it a part of your Life Reading, as a
supplement, so that the whole story will be available as
a study. Bob and I were discussing the possibility of an
article being written on your Life Reading, around your
report, with your permission, of course. I am making
a copy of it - the entire reading and report - for Violet
Shelley, our Editor of Publications, with the idea of getting
her reaction as to a news article on it. Would you object
to this? Of course, you could read and edit it before
publishing.
I have only deleted your LAST name and left the rest of it
as you explained it in your report. Is this okay?
Did you know that the name ERASTUS is in the Bible in two
places? Acts 19:22 and II Timothy 4:20.
By the way, your typing job was so perfect that I did not
need to change one thing in the report, except to list the
correct Case Number and paragraph numbers according to the
way they now appear on the file copy, and according to the
indexing of each paragraph, etc.
It seems to me that in my letter on tape I went into some
detail regarding some paragraphs, telling you some of my
ideas regarding how I felt the reading had worked out even
though you had not noticed it in a few instances. However, I
can't remember now what those ideas were. I should stick
to typing my own letters. After all, I am primarily a
typist!
Bless you and yours. Oh, I forgot to tell you that my
beloved Al passed through "God's Open Door" on June 27,
1968. Enclosed are a couple of memorial write-ups about
him. He is still with us. As the readings say, good
lives on - and love goes far beyond the grave. I know
from personal experience that this is true.
Sincerely, [signed] Gladys Davis Turner
Edgar Cayce Readings © 1971, 1993, 1994, 1995 by the Edgar Cayce Foundation